December 22nd, 2006



Have you seen the new Transformers trailer?

I have to admit I'm torn. On the one hand it's cool seeing real vehicles transform into robots in what looks like a realistic fashion. The CGI looks about as good as CGI ever can on the small screen, but I'm sure it'll look good in the theater. And while I still think Prime with flame up the side looks fucking stupid, the transformation looks pretty decent from what I can actually see of it. The action looks pretty cool, some one clearly worked hard to make shit blow up good and bring the summer explodeyfest back from it's exile due to pirates and grown men in tights*. And Peter Cullen is in it, so Optimus Prime will sound like Optimus Prime, which is always nice.

The problem? It looks like it's going to be a mix between Independence Day and Starship Troopers, and that sort of irks me off. Why? Because Transformers IS FOR KIDS! It's based off a TOY LINE that had a cartoon designed for children! Even the comic book was kid stuff (slightly older kids, but still for kids) Seriously, all this "They better not make that thing I loved as a child into a kiddie movie" stuff has got to stop.Of course there is also the issue that this is a Micheal Bay film and these days a lot of filmmakers think CGI is a good substitute for story, plot and character development. I've been less and less impressed by the CGI I've seen it being used the last few years, particularly the way virtual camera effects have been abused, but that's another story.

Honestly, I'm sick of all this "Ooo, thing from my childhood that I loved, let's update it and make it more grown up because my tastes have changed but my desire for nostalgia hasn't" bullshit. What's next? A new Disney DVD for "Mickey's Heroin Addiction" and then maybe "Elmo Whores Out" ... Okay, that last one came out years ago under the title "Elmo's World" and there were many many discs in that series, but you know what I mean. Lest you forget, all this rampant and meaningless updating is why we have Loonatics in the world.

I can get over Transformers being more grown up, I just hope that it's sort of coherent and doesn't suck.

*I have no problem with either pirates or grown men wearing tights, but summer is for 'spolsions! If shit don't blow up and get blowed up good, I'm just not happy.
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